Friday, June 12, 2009

R U READY TO DOWN SOME SMACK??? EXTREME RECAP

Matt and Adam take the brand extension very seriously. They each only identify with one brand and actively follow it. Matt bleeds Raw red and Adam has Smackdown blue coursing through his veins. Being soldiers in the ongoing war for brand supremacy has charged both of them up enough to provide handy recaps of the previous week's show. That way, no new viewers will feel lost. Thus, every Monday and Friday, we here at LOL, Wresslin' will offer you a refresher. Hey, it's the least we can do.

Ah yes, the second half of our Extreme Rules recap! Or as I like to call it, the better half. That's because Smackdown rules. Our matches do not involve injured Animals, fat dudes (well, one fat dude, but he got FIRED), or big hogged cowards. Nope, just solid, awesome wrestling.

Take for example, the first Smackdown match of the night. Chris Jericho and Rey Mysterio have had a pretty awesome feud, punctuated by Jericho's awesome sneak attack on Rey two weeks ago. Rey won the first match in the series, but this time there is a special set a rules; an extreme set of rules, if you will.



Anyway, the story going in is that Jericho is going to a) win the Intercontinental title, b) not get hit with the 619, and c) remove Rey's mask [you know (tm), like he did in 1998 WCW]. I'd say Jericho was fairly successful in those goals.

\Step 1: Loosen already untied mask

Step 2: Block weaker finish then Walls of Jericho by pulling off loose mask

Step 3: Pin embarrassed Mexican

Step 4: Profit

In our second barn burner, CM Punk and Umaga wrestled in a strap match.


No one is quite sure of the rules, but I think it leads to Umaga being fired or something. Well, CM Punk somehow won this game of Mario Kart.

"Thank God I got that last banana to slip him up..."


And in our main event: Jeff Hardy challenging Edge for the world title. In their corners- a shit ton of ladder.

Above: Shit ton of ladders

So ladder matches are usually kind of similar. Attack with the ladder. Topple a ladder. Someone touches the belt, but fails to win. Which is why this ladder match was awesome because, get this, they did new spots. Like this sharpshooter ON A LADDER!

Like Montreal, but not.

Or this Twist of Fate ON A LADDER!

Something Joey Styles says

And check this out. Jeff Hardy jumped onto the title, and held on, unable to win the belt!



Sadly, getting Jeff down wasn't as exciting as getting him up.

Still, let's go to the finish line, as Edge and Jeff were fighting it out on the ladder when, get this, a new spot was invented! Edge was pinned between the rungs of the ladder, helpless and forced to watch his old rival Jeff Hardy win the World Title!

...and on the 3rd down, Adam Copeland rose...


But, Jeff's probably leaving the company! Putting the title on him is as silly as putting it on an injured Batista! Oh what's one to do?



If you're planning on getting a cheap pin, why bother wearing your wrestling gear? Seriously, it's gotta reek after that Umaga match.

Oh snap! Mr. Money in the Bank is cashing in!

Iron man match this was not.


Man, Smackdown is crazy right now! How will people react to CM Punk screwing Jeff out of the title? Are we due for an addict vs straight edge feud? God I hope so. MyNetwork TV 8/7c (and hulu!)

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