Recession-era spending (on WWE stuff!)

We found out during WWE's conference call with investors last week that the Consumer Products division saw a sharp decline in the second quarter over last year.

What is that, you ask? Well, think of "consumer products" as all the crap you buy, save for tickets and PPVs. The merch - DVDs, shirts, mugs, hats, and even those cute little WWE teddy bears we're so fond of.

Now, WWE explains that they've been doing rather well during a tough economy, and things were just going to catch up to them eventually. Also, they've done hardly any promotion for their DVD releases, to which you might say "What DVD releases?", which is their point exactly.

The Laugh Twins are not above the rest of you when it comes to being tight on money. We had to cancel that third hot tub we were going to have installed in the LOL Cave, and stopped popped five bottles of Dom P every other night. We also traded in the gas-guzzling LOL Mobile for a more fuel efficient LOL Hybrid.

It has pedals and a motor, therefore a hybrid.

We thought we'd scour WWE Shopzone to find you the best deals to be had in these times when you're pinching every penny.


Jeff Hardy "Immune to Fear" beach towel

Right off the bat, we have this bad boy on sale for under $14. Sporting a picture of Jeff Hardy's face, this towel screams, "My name is _____, and I have a problem." It's also adorned with all sorts of words that describe the fearless Jeff Hardy, like "fear." Of course, being a Jeff Hardy product, this thing is popular. "Izzy" of Centralia, Illinois says:

love it but this is one thing i would not take to the beach with me. someone may take it

We agree! At this price, this thing is certainly a steal!

Nunzio Deluxe Agression action figure

Oddly enough, "deluxe," "agression," and "action" are three words we would never use to describe Nunzio, but for seven bucks, can you get much better? No one has reviewed this, but that's probably just because they're too busy playing with it! The description says "Collect all your favorite superstars." Apparently, this person couldn't even be bothered to put an exclamation point at the end of that sentence. Also, for your seven dollars, this figure comes complete with packaging! Don't worry that it'll be shipped loose in a box!

Be careful though, because we're warned

***WHILE SUPPLIES LAST***

However, we somehow think that's not going to be a problem.

WWE Superstars comforter

Allow us to set the scene: You've just spent the night hanging at a party with your boys. You find a young lass there, and both of you engage in conversation over two cold bottles of Smirnoff Ice. Eventually, as these things do, the talk turns a little bawdy, and you whisk the female back to your efficiency. You dig through your collection of paper matches, using one to light a couple candles and then she's greeted by the cartoon image of the Undertaker staring up from your Full-size bed.

Some of you may think that would be a deal killer, but what better way to make a girl feel secure than sleeping under the watchful eye of the Deadman? Or Batista or John Cena for that matter? Make sure she knows she's in for a "Smackdown," and tonight is gonna be "Raw!"

Boogeyman figurine ornament

There are certain things that, whenever you think of them, you can't help but have memories of Christmas - a warm fire as snow falls outside; the smell of sugar cookies in the oven, or fresh cider in your mug; the radio playing Bing Crosby; a legendary ghost-like creature that is an ambiguous embodiment of terror in the minds of children.

Alright, even we can't pretend on this one. It's hard to imagine that anyone purchased anything related to the Boogeyman, much less a Christmas ornament. However, at $4.49, you really have to ask yourself "Why not?"

D-Generation X yarmulke

Who says dressing for the synagogue means leaving your crotch-chop at the door? We can't think of a better to practice Judaism and remind yourself that God is always above you than supporting a blue-blood from Connecticut and hard-partying "sexy boy" turned Born-Again Christian. We think this review says it all:

Title: WOOOW!!!!!!

Reviewed By: Benjamin Mordaci Goldstien, Birmingham Alabama on 3/26/2009
This is so awesome!! I get so many compliments when I go to the synagogue!!!

He would be from Birmingham, wouldn't he?


We think with these few items, you can not only have some kick-ass stuff, but you can save some of that hard-earned money of yours. The clearance section of WWEShop.com is actually quite an amazing treasure chest, though there are a few things we wish we could find there. Such as a wrestling-themed Zubaz workout pants.

There are way more than a thousand words in this picture.