It's over...for real this time

We're sure all of you have been closely following Blog War '09. That's admirable, and we appreciate you being on our side, but frankly, what have you been following?

Truthfully, there hasn't been much "war" lately in Blog War '09. Both sides have seemed perfectly content to co-exist on the internet; Ray does her thing, we do ours, though at a clearly higher capacity. We've seemed to accept that we were fighting over a poorly-lit and dusty corner of the web, and that it didn't matter much anyway. It's as if two nations went to war over some little island somewhere, but neither side officially declared war in the first place. That would be silly.

Somewhere like this, just for example.

However, don't think this means there wasn't a winner. Of course there was a winner. It was us!

Hello? Two Kings.

We're sure you're asking yourself, "How can you declare yourself the winner when the war never really ended?" Well, we can, and here's how. First, we remind that the war DID end, no matter how much Ray wants to deny that she didn't crudely sign her name on the Terms of Surrender drawn up in MS Paint. Nevertheless, we'll let that one slide, seeing as how there's some contention as to whether that counts.

We direct you, rather, to her two guest postings here on LOL, Wresslin' (which, again, were part of her surrender, but moving on...). We noticed something interesting when we read them. Well, two things. First, they weren't as good as ours, but second, there seemed to be a hidden code. We've read/seen/heard of The Da Vinci Code, so we know more than your average bear about hidden meanings.



Here are the first paragraphs of both of her W.W.W. entries:

After spending last Wednesday in delightful Dallas, it was time to hop on a plane and make my way to glamorous New York so that Adam could hand-deliver my video for this week. How did he hand-deliver a YouTube video? Shut up! You’re spoiling it! My love affair with New York City goes back some way, and was fully consummated when I visited for the first time in 2001 (pre 9/11). It then grew in to a borderline obsession. Despite a short MTV fueled fascination with LA, New York City has always been my number one place on the map.

First of all, let me say how strange but particularly exciting it feels to be hanging out at the Texas branch of LOL Wresslin. I feel a little bit like I’m trespassing and am pretty sure I’ll open a door to have a bucket of water fall on my head or something. I was also wholly convinced that my video would be something odd and unfathomable, engineered to catch me out and leave me with nothing to say. Imagine my joy at finding a humorous CM Punk video in my email inbox.

Using a complicated system of algorithms derived from the cosine of Pi, the Fibonacci sequence, and the Pythagorean theorem, we found this pattern in her words:

After spending last Wednesday in delightful Dallas, it was time to hop on a plane and make my way to glamorous New York so that Adam could hand-deliver my video for this week. How did he hand-deliver a YouTube video? Shut up! You’re spoiling it! My love affair with New York City goes back some way, and was fully consummated when I visited for the first time in 2001 (pre 9/11). It then grew in to a borderline obsession. Despite a short MTV fueled fascination with LA, New York City has always been my number one place on the map.

First of all, let me say how strange but particularly exciting it feels to be hanging out at the Texas branch of LOL Wresslin. I feel a little bit like I’m trespassing and am pretty sure I’ll open a door to have a bucket of water fall on my head or something. I was also wholly convinced that my video would be something odd and unfathomable, engineered to catch me out and leave me with nothing to say. Imagine my joy at finding a humorous CM Punk video in my email inbox.

Which when rearranged (according to the same algorithms) say:

I love LOL, Wresslin'. I say humorous, delightful, glamorous and number one. I'm last. I'll catch Adam on my head. Me feels exciting obsession consummated.

Now, we're not entirely sure what that last part means, but the math says it's in there, so we'll chalk that up to a cultural misunderstanding. In any case, she clearly has great words for us, and ranks the wrestling comedy blogs thusly:

1. Adam and Matt of LOL, Wresslin'
2. Ray of Wrestlegasm

Thank you for all the support over the past months, and we're so proud that we could be victorious for you. In celebration, we think you should light up some fireworks this weekend. You can wait until Saturday. It's cool.