W.W.W. featuring Stone Cold Steve Austin/Kane and The National Wrestling Alliance

On Wednesdays, we here at LOL, Wresslin' like to really pull out the stops and offer up a double shot of righteously killer content. Why Wednesday? Well, we could impress you with market research, work habit studies, and human psychology tendencies to show you there's a scientific reason the middle of the week is the best time to bring your A-game. However, truth be told, we don't have any of that stuff and settled on Wednesday because that was the only day that didn't have any content scheduled.

So, here you have "Watch Wresslin' Wednesdays." Please feel free to suggest a better title, because we are woefully uncreative when it comes to naming stuff.

Better at naming stuff then us

The idea of W.W.W. is we each send the other a video that is related to wrestling (a match, promo, interview, guest starring spot, etc.). The only restriction is that it cannot be user-created, so Botchamania videos ain't going to fly here, pal. Neither of us know what kind of video we're going to get that day.

After viewing, we each write a response. This could be anything we choose: a straight commentary, a philosophical enlightenment, or classless ridicule. Just as we don't know what kind of video the other will select, neither do we know what the other will write or how they will write it. What you end up with is a mash-up of styles, which in our book equates to two-blogs-in-one, and we can take the rest of the day off.

Matt's video to Adam- Stone Cold Calls out Kane



Adam's response...

So here we got Stone Cold Steve Austin.

WHAT!?

I said we got Stone Cold Steve Austin.

WHAT!?

Co-GM of Raw.

WHAT!?

Former WWF champion.

WHAT!?

And he's got a problem with Kane.

WHAT!?

I said he's got a problem with Kane.

WHAT!?

Kane.

WHAT!?

Big Red Machine.

WHAT!?

Used to wear a mask.

WHAT!?

Doesn't wear a mask anymore.

WHAT!?

Not happy about that.

WHAT!?

Wears a black towel now.

WHAT!?

Went a little crazy about that.

WHAT!?

Chokeslammed Eric Bischoff.

WHAT!?

I said chokeslammed Eric Bischoff.

WHAT!?

Sent that dirty sum bitch down to Hell!

WHAT!?

Gimme a Hell yea!

HELL YEA!

Now old Stone Cold is in charge of Raw.

WHAT!?

Calling Kane down to the ring.

WHAT!?

These people love you Kane.

WHAT!?

I said they love you.

WHAT!?

It's Montreal.

WHAT!?

It's weird here.

WHAT!?

Still upset of Bret.

QUEL?

I said still upset over Bret.

WHAT!?

King calls it "Bizzaro World"

WHAT!?

Like that episode of Seinfeld.

WHAT!?

Or Superman comics.

WHAT!?

"I'm like you...but a little more bizarre."

WHAT!?

Smallville.

WHAT!?

LOL

WHAT!?

I don't think you're funny. I said "LOL."

WHAT!?

Goodfellas

WHAT!?

You're ugly.

WHAT!?

But you don't have to react like a retarded child

WHAT!?

Are you retarded?

WHAT!?

You wanna fight old Stone Cold?

WHAT!?

Just know I'm getting my heat back and I don't take bumps anymore.

WHAT!?

I said I keep my heat.

WHAT!?

I'm hurt but I still sell tee shirts.

WHAT!?

Tee shirts.

WHAT!?

So you're going to get stunned and I'm going to crack open some Steve Weisers.

WHAT!?

You chokeslammed ole' Stone Cold?

WHAT!?

Credits?

WHAT!?

Copyright?

WHAT!?

Production logo?

WHAT!?

I bet I got up and stunned you four more times.

WHAT!?

Then drank some more beer.

WHAT!?

I said more beer.

WHAT!?

Tequila.

WHAT!?

Sarsaparilla.

WHAT!?

Then some beer again.

WHAT!?

The end.

WHAT!?


Adam's video to Matt - Breaking news from the NWA

Matt's note: Adam gave me a video that can't be embedded. Please click here to enjoy.

Matt's response...

Well, that certainly was some hard-hitting news there, David. I'm glad you broke into my internet surfing to bring me that nugget of info.

Seriously, there isn't much that bugs me more than obviously pre-recorded segments meant to come off as "live" or "unscripted." I may be out-of-bounds on this one, but after a fair amount a research, I can't seem to find an outlet for "NWA Breaking News," other than the website he promotes at the very end. I'm really starting to hate David Marquez. I don't know if this was your idea, but I'm going to blame it on you.

So we're supposed to believe that he was all ready to do a live shot with whomever he was supposed to be on with, when Bob Trobich calls up and says, "Stop what you're doing and put me on right away." Even though we're watching this recorded on the internet. And there was plenty of time to record an actual segment regarding this title vacancy, rather than have us think you uploaded a video of a ditched piece on the School of Hard Knocks because of breaking news. Ugh...I hate you even more Marquez.

I hate you so much that it's hard for me to even comment on the actual point of this video - the NWA taking their World Titles away from TNA. But do allow me to comment for just a moment. I only want to say, "Hey NWA! This isn't 1983 anymore!! NO. ONE. CARES." Seriously, I can fully understand the want to not be associated with TNA television, but that was the only exposure your title was getting. I appreciate the history lesson, Trobich, but you're trying to convince me that this title is on the same level as it was when Dusty Rhodes or Ric Flair held it??

This is like saying the American Football League is still around and is no longer going to allow the NFL the use of their championship. Well, give me a second to shed a tear! I'm sure the NFL is falling all over themselves, wondering what they're going to do without being able to award an AFL championship. Oh wait, they have the Super Bowl, and crown their own champion? Ok, nevermind, piss off, AFL.

Seriously NWA, you're nothing more than the governing body of a bunch of indy leagues. I see TNA suffered mightily when you took your belts and went home.


Oh, that's right, they created their own belt and kept on going. I'm sure their tummy hurt a bit from that gut punch you threw them, though.

And who have you traded up for, since Christian wasn't good enough to be the TNA World Champion? Well, according to their website (which is about the only place to find the NWA right now), the champ is none other than Blue Demon, Jr.


Well, the man does have a Full Throttle named after him, so good choice?

Look, you've got me all off-track from my original idea for this: hating on David Marquez. For those of you don't know (all of you), Marquez owns and operates the NWA Pro Wrestling promotion in California. "Oh wow, why bag on that dude, Matt? I'm sure he's loaded and swimming in chicks." Hurm, you might be right...better pump the brakes on this for a minute while I scrounge up his MySpace page.


Oh hey! You know who else is single, David? Me. Congratulations.

You know it might have something to do with the fact that this is your page headline:

"An aide to the House Energy and Commerce Committee told ABC News that Congress has requested documents from the WWE and two other major professional wrestling organizations Total Nonstop Action Wrestling and the National Wrestling Alliance."

Yep, that's a real attention grabber there, pal. Of course, mine simply promotes this blog, so I'll just call that one a draw. Not that you should be proud of that.

Here's a photo from his aptly titled album "Me and My Stupid Self":

Clearly, he likes the cock.

And here he is wearing a jacket while the popular kids carouse in the swimming pool:


Eh, you know what? Forget it. I can't hate you. Life clearly already does. I'm perfectly content to go on for the rest of my life, just being neutral about you, ok?

No, wait. No I'm not.