R U READY TO DOWN SOME SMACK??? vol. 5

Matt and Adam take the brand extension very seriously. They each only identify with one brand and actively follow it. Matt bleeds Raw red and Adam has Smackdown blue coursing through his veins. Being soldiers in the ongoing war for brand supremacy has charged both of them up enough to provide handy recaps of the previous week's show. That way, no new viewers will feel lost. Thus, every Monday and Friday, we here at LOL, Wresslin' will offer you a refresher. Hey, it's the least we can do.

Last week's Smackdown had a Halloween theme, as numerous (face) wrestlers took a break from wearing costumes to the ring to wear costumes to the ring. But it didn't just stop with them, as our announce team, JR and the Tazz followed Michelle McCool's lead and dressed to the military nines.

Click here for more link whoring.

As far as actual wrestling goes, GM Vickie Guerrero continues her reign of terr....ific management as she booked a casket match between the Undertake and Chavo Guerrero in honor of the Pagan festival! This is the kind of progressive decision making you will only find on Smackdown, since Smackdown has a history of progressive hires. In fact, she's the second handicapable GM in wheelchair we've had in our show's history.

It's true! It's true!

Two ECW and Two Raw guys teamed with our Smackdown entertainers extraordinaire, as the Hardys and Rey Mysterio beat Kane, Mark Henry, and MVP. One guess on who ended up staring at the lights.

Nice screen shot, shit dick.

Seriously, it's amazing how much he's jobbing lately. The only logical conclusion is that he graphically explained how he's have sex with Linda McMahon, all the while Vince is standing behind him getting madder and madder (like, you can see steam and redness), but MVP is oblivious to this. So he keeps going on and on about what position he'd be in, and what foods strengthen his sperm, while Jimmy Wang Yang and referee Charles Robinson look on in concern. Then, MVP makes an exaggerated orgasm face, and turns around...when Vince suddenly disappears, ninja style. Then, the very next week, MVP is being pinned by Funaki.

It's true! It's true!

Also, Vladimir Kozlov will finally got his title shot, at Survivor Series no less, if (and that's a big if folks), he can beat the Undertaker next week (tonight) on Smackdown. I'm sure an honorable man with ties to our greatest ally will in now way cheat to win. No sir. He'll compete like a man, and not do whatever it takes for the biggest match of his career.

Just like Rocky IV, minus the American being the underdog and badass John Cafferty soundtrack

Also, the entire reason Kozlov will face the Undertaker is because Chavo continues the Guerrero tradition of being stuffed into caskets.

Jake Roberts: can i b nex, plz?

Let's do this America! Change is upon us! Tune in for Smackdown, 8/7c on OURNetwork TV!