W.W.W. featuring RVD and Jay Lethal

On Wednesdays, we here at LOL, Wresslin' like to really pull out the stops and offer up a double shot of righteously killer content. Why Wednesday? Well, we could impress you with market research, work habit studies, and human psychology tendencies to show you there's a scientific reason the middle of the week is the best time to bring your A-game. However, truth be told, we don't have any of that stuff and settled on Wednesday because that was the only day that didn't have any content scheduled.

So, here you have "Watch Wresslin' Wednesdays," the ORIGINAL wrestling-themed, YouTube video comedic co-commentary. Please feel free to suggest a better title, because we are woefully uncreative when it comes to naming stuff.

Better at naming stuff than us.

The idea of W.W.W. is we each send the other a video that is related to wrestling (a match, promo, interview, guest starring spot, etc.). The only restriction is that it cannot be user-created, so your poorly-edited explanation of Chris Jericho's "Save.Us" promos ain't going to fly here, pal. Neither of us know what kind of video we're going to get that day.

After viewing, we each write a response. This could be anything we choose: a straight commentary, a philosophical enlightenment, or classless ridicule. Just as we don't know what kind of video the other will select, neither do we know what the other will write or how they will write it. What you end up with is a mash-up of styles, which in our book equates to two-blogs-in-one, and we can take the rest of the day off.

Adam's video to Matt - Rob Van Dam and Booker T's Rocking New Year's Eve



Matt's response...

You know what I like about RVD? Well, first, I'll tell you that there's not too many things I like about him, period. His wrestling, while athletic and daring, is mostly stale, and he's in the bottom one percent for mic skills. Seriously, I think the Great Khali is better, and the most that he's said is screaming incoherently at telephones. I don't find him an entertaining character in the least, but other people do, and I think that those other people are stupid.

However, I'll tell you what I do like about him, and that's that he doesn't give a shit. RVD's job is to wrestle, and he's lost that job in the past because of his frequent, and public, drug use. Despite this, his user name on YouTube is "RVDTV420." 420, really? You know who celebrates 420, RVD? College students and the unemployed.

Let me amend that. Those are not the only people who celebrate 420; those are just the only people that it's somewhat acceptable that they should celebrate it.

Oh, and heads of state.

Here's another thing: this is a New Year's Eve video, presumably shot on New Year's Eve, and directly relevant to New Year's Eve. When did RVD think it was appropriate to post this 47 second descent into a pot-fueled madness? June 1st, 2009. Somehow, we're more timely than he is.

Also, where the hell is the Masterpiece? What has he got better to do? Why wouldn't you want to hang out with a bunch of guys who indulge you and actually refer to you as "The Masterpiece"?

Speaking of the Masterpiece, while "researching" this article, I came across the unofficial Chris Masters website, the banner of which informs me that Masters had sexual intercourse with my mother. I'm not sure how this fellow who runs the site would have that sort of information, but I'm just going to assume it's validity. MASTERBURN~! ONLINE also says that the Masterpiece hates HBO television series, and his penis is desired by no less than eight "hot" celebrities, such as Tara Reid, Alanis Morrisette, and Shannon Elizabeth.

This site is either the greatest true fan page in history, or a well-crafted satire, and I wish that somehow it's both, because it's genius on either level. For instance, we're given the definition of Masterglitter:

Masters's robe is made of glitter. When Masters takes the robe off, you can see bits of glitter on his awesome shoulders. That my friends, is Masterglitter.

He also gives us a few Masterburns, meaning times when Chris Masters totally put someone in their place, such as:

"Go ahead and have a seat, sir."

and...

"I got this one-way ticket to anywhere in the United States, because let's face it, anywhere is better than being in Omaha, Nebraska."

Well, RVD, Chris Masters didn't show up to your NYE party, so you might as well consider yourself Masterburned. Face! Masterface!

Matt's video to Adam- Black Machismo Jay Lethal Interview



Adam's response...

The video game TNA Impact! was released on September 9th, 2008. MikeReganGR (the interviewer in the video) decided to post this video to Youtube.



Listen, I can't blame him for keeping this one on the shelf for a while; it's pretty terrible. First off, his mic is WAY too hot. Second, he's a fat mess who should be....well something rather than seen. I mean, how could we miss something THAT huge, but you catch my drift.



Of course, Mr. Regan is not the only not-ready-for-prime-time player. No, Mr. Lethal is pretty terrible as well. Here are his first few words:

"Well....uhhh...so faruh...we've doneuh, um, the motion capture. Mo-cap is what they call it. "

Things noticeably pick up when discussion turns to The Machoman Randy Savage. And why shouldn't it? The Machoman is the best thing to ever happen to professional wrestling. Not Hogan. Not Bret. Not even LOL, Wresslin. Nope, it's Macho.

Seriously, in addition to being a former world champion, thespian, and Slim Jim endorser, he's also a master rapper. You know (tm) this. This is also why we here love Jay Lethal.

Yes, Mr Lethal is one of the 3,000 crazies who actually own Be a Man. I can send Jay Lethal a text message (we're both from New Jersey, natch) that says "Solemn Piano" and he will text me back "In today's news, Macho Man Randy Savage has signed a recording contract with Big 3 Records as a rap artist." Be a Man is a bond thicker then blood.

Also, Jay Lethal says he's not good at rapping, which is stupid because he's black.

Also stupid: Christopher Daniels cutting a promo to a venue that no one will ever see.

Even more stupid: Lethal saying that Hogan should "be a man." He's your boss now, dude.

Although that never stopped one guy

The newest WWE video game!

We're avid fans of video games as much as we are of wrestling, so we're always excited to hear about a new game coming out based on our favorite wrestlers! Imagine how great it was when we found out the next one would be a text-based adventure game! You see, in the days before fancy graphics (or any at all), there could still be fantastical journies taken simply by reading text! Can you believe it?? Why didn't they think of this before?!

Basically, the way these work is you're presented a block of text describing your situation, and you type in what you want to do next drawn from a bank of commands. It's not much more complicated than that.

This game, coincidentally, is based on one of our favorite wrestlers - Batista! We've managed to get a preview of some of the scenarios in the adventure, so take a peek and see if you'd like it!

Oh, and you're welcome.

========================================

You are a member of the church. A deacon, and because of your physical attributes, you've been sworn to protect the controversial Reverend D-Von. You do your job well, and yet one day, the Reverend "accidentally" hits you during a battle.

/punch d-von

You PUNCH the Reverend D-Von, causing him massive internal injuries. The Reverend shambles off, muttering that's he's lost his faith following the beating and must transfer to a smaller and less-funded church.

Now, you are all alone. The kingdom of Raw is in the distance, glinting on the hill like a siren.

/walk

..............

Finally, after months of effort, you are awarded a spot in the Royal Rumble and you win! Congratulations! Now, you are given your choice of which king to challenge for the throne: His Highness Layfield, ruler of rival kingdom of Smackdown, or your own monarch, King Helmsley, who has taken you under his wing alongside Prince Orton and Flair the mystic.

You are in a secretive meeting with King Helmsley.

King: Who will you challenge? Don't forget, the ruler of Smackdown attempted to run you over with his stretch carriage.

Rather than speaking, you decide to indicate your choice with silence, thereby making a larger impact...

/move thumb

In which direction would you like to MOVE your THUMB?

/move thumb down

King Helmsley is stunned you would challenge his reign!!

/powerbomb king

Through what would you like to POWERBOMB the KING?

/table

You have just POWERBOMBED the KING through the dining room TABLE. He is defeated. You are now the sovereign ruler. However, those loyal to the former head of state have abandoned you. You are alone.

/walk

...................

Your kingdom is under attack from foreign invaders, including the giant savage only known as Mark, rumored to be the strongest man in the world. You face the behemoth on the battlefield, but you are King Batista, and you have no fear.

What do you do?

/move thumbs down

The giant does not respond. He licks his lips, as if he is ready to rend the flesh from your bones with his teeth.

/use machine guns

You shake your arms violently at the gargantuan Mark. Two serfs kneel beside you, lighting tubes of black powder to create a spectacular display of light and sound. Still, Mark does not flinch.

/smirk

You flash a quick smirk and a chuckle. Mark is now enraged! He charges and slams you to the ground, surely the world's strongest slam!

You have torn your triceps and must give up your crown, no longer able to rule with violence as you so often have before. You have been sent home to recover from your injuries.

Several months later, you are health enough to leave your home, ready to defend yourself and regain your throne. You wake up, all alone in your bed.

/walk

.....................

Your party has come upon a massive pit. Your fellow travelers are trepidatious, and begin TALKING.

Mysterio: Is that some sort of pit, ese?

Porter: Hell yes it is, and it looks dangerous! That's not ballin' at all.

Mysterio: How big do you think it is, amigo?

Cena: Yo fool, that's stretches on for miles!

/say stop talking

You tell your party to quit their conversation. You are tired of them talking out of their heads.

/walk

To where do you want to WALK?

/walk to pit

You WALK to the entrance of the PIT OF DANGER. Which members of your party will you take with you?

/walk alone

Wresslin' Media Roundup!

Professional wrestling sure is busy lately! We'd like to take credit for that. If we never published out LOLies a while back, both WWE and TNA would have no idea what to do. But since we did the shows have been packed. Whether it was our Wrestlers of the Year going one on one or our two Saddest Wrestlers preparing to go at it, it is undeniable that it's a good time be a wrestling fan.

However, there are times when there's too much going on. It's impossible to narrow it down to one topic. This is one of those times. Thus, we present to you the goings on of the entire wrestling world, albeit this time in some more unconventional places.

Television

Ask the Laugh Twins what their favorite television show is and you'd get some diverse answers. Sure, Raw and Smackdown are there, but the Twins interests extend beyond sweaty men. Well not really, because we also love 24 and Lost! However, one of our other favorite shows is a little gem on the FX network known as It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

For those not in the know, allow us to drop some 411 on you. Basically, imagine Seinfeld if it took place in Philadelphia, involved more depraved people, things happen, and is funny. You got IASiP. Anyway, last week's episode involved wrestling! The whole episode isn't on hulu yet (it will be Friday). Even so, it'll only be up for a small amount of time. Thus, check out this preview.



Yes, that was Danny Devito eating garbage. And yes, that was Rowdy Roddy Piper playing a wrestler.

Now normally, we Laugh Twins take immense glee in repeating jokes and passing them off as our own, but this is too special. For 30 minutes the entire episode delivers. Every joke hits. They nail wrestling culture very well. And they compare Hulk Hogan "to that of a Chinese man." Check it out if you haven't already.

Radio

The Allegeded LOLoCast still rules. Wrestlegasm also did some audio post which was really good when she put us over.

Internet

Well Ric Flair made us cry when he cut this ridiculous promo:



Elsewhere, LOL, Wresslin' continues to dominate every week day with the most beau coup of all wrestling comedy. Also, Shad Gaspard told Twitter he had swine flu, once again proving that Twitter is stupid (follow us!).

Film

WWE Films is planning on making an Undertaker origin story. Really.


Video Games

Smackdown vs Raw 2010 came out and is being heralded as the best Smackdown yet. In addition to a roster that includes both Christian and The Brian Kendrick, SvR2k10 boasts the most robust creation mode ever. In addition to old stand bys like create a wrestler and create a finisher, this year's edition has create a storyline. Basically, it's time to put your booking to the test! And to top it off, you can upload it to the the game servers and trade with other players (SiC's and all!).

So although awesome, there are still a few gripes we'd like ironed out. Listen (read?) up, THQ. Here's some consulting, pro boner (heheh) from the LT's!

• Include Ric Flair and Rowdy Roddy Piper- This should be a no brainer.
• In addition to the usual in-game Internet, include comedy blogs as well. And if you think you're going to get away with having a LAWL, Wrestling! then think again when our lawyer calls.
• Still need to tweek Create A Wrestler. As dictated in the Bragging Rights Bet, Matt must create Adam and play as him online. As we write this, Matt is having trouble accurately depicting Adam. He needs to look like:

Like this, but more handsome

And...

Like this, but sweeter.

• More realistic breast physics. Like this.
• Have there be penalties for wrestler's blading, like in real life! Maybe if both wrestlers get cut open and one of them happens to be William Regal there will be a SMALL chance of the other wrestler contracting HIV.
• More people should scream "TEH ANIMALE! GUNZ!" when Batista comes to the ring

Come on guys! It'd be easy to make all this happen! But no, all you care about is your stupid money and not the fans! ARGH!

R U READY TO DOWN SOME SMACK??? Reserving Judgment

Matt and Adam take the brand extension very seriously. They each only identify with one brand and actively follow it. Matt bleeds Raw red and Adam has Smackdown blue coursing through his veins. Being soldiers in the ongoing war for brand supremacy has charged both of them up enough to provide handy recaps of the previous week's show. That way, no new viewers will feel lost. Thus, every Monday and Friday, we here at LOL, Wresslin' will offer you a refresher. Hey, it's the least we can do.

This Sunday, our Lord and Savior is returning and he shall judge us. Yes, judgment day is upon us, and we can only hope that we are deemed worthy. Thankfully, there are some simple tests to deduce this. First- do you watch Smackdown? If the answer is "Yes" then you're cool. That should be about it.

So since we're so cool and love Smackdown, let's go over everything to get ready for the big PPV this Sunday. First off, John Morrison (who is now a face) has a feud with Shelton Benjamin. For some reason Shelton is starting crap with The Friday Night Delight. Seriously, it's just "some reason." So since Shelton is a "heel", he's inherently lazy, he found his old tag team partner, and Hall of Awesomeness inductee, Charlie Haas to take on The Guru of Greatness.

"I haas an impression of a good wrestler..."

So actually being on TV seems to haas inspire Charlie, as he used that Seton Hall background of his to wrestle the man with the golden abs.


Unfortunately, Charlie then remember that he is Charlie Haas, and he's much more suited for knocking Lillian Garcia off the ring apron then actually, you know (tm), winning matches. Thus, the usual outcome happened.

Oh stop, Shelton. Like you really expected different?

For the second week in a row, Edge and CM Punk wrestled in a non-title match. And, for the second week in a row, CM Punk sort of kicked ass.

Adrenaline definitely isn't some sort of high

That should be enough to win the match, and enact his dumb plan to cash in the title shot and win a second match to become the champion. Of course, it wasn't to be as Edge just conceded victory and got himself counted out. What a dastardly heel! Still, if that wasn't enough to drive a man to drink, Umaga came out (AGAIN) to attack Punk for no reason whatsoever. Well, at least we'll have the two of them wrestle at Judgement Day. Because that's SO much better then having a title match.

"So much pain..I should start hanging out with Jeff..."

Undertaker's favorite cadaver, Michelle McCool, took on Mr. Fugi's daughter, Gail Kim, in a match. I guess it was for the #1 contendership for the ladies belt, but since we haven't seen Melina at all since she was drafted, I'm going to go ahead and assume that they're fighting over ponies or something. Still, maybe they'll kiss?

Gail Kim, switch places with me and let me turn around.

Seriously, I will kiss this girl toes all the way up to her lips. Then I'd move up to her stomach.

And in our main event, current #1 contender, The Red Hood, took on Chris Jericho. If Jericho wins the main event at Judgment Day becomes a triple threat match. I don't know why, but I wish boxing and UFC adopted this policy. Anyway, Jeff had his fans in full force!

I'm clearly not emotionally immature. Not in the least.

And he even had a kid stand at ringside, rooting him! That man loves his fans!

Suck it, Ray.

Anyway, the power of too much dosage took over the power of screaming kids, because Jeff was pretty much dominated by the paragon of virtue.

"Owwww...he's slightly bending my knees....the horror!"

"Heavens to megatroid!"

Also, Todd Grisham is a little sissy. I think he should change his name to "Leslie Butterscotch." So the combination of Leslie being a wuss and Edge not appreciating Jericho's plan of action sort of led to Chris being an all out rudnik. You know, because everyone should be super conscious of the announce table. That always happens.

Heels facing off?? But who do I boo??

He probably got Honey Nut Cherrios all over the apron.

And, if there's one thing Jeff hates, it's when people disrespect one of his Heroinmaniacs! This was all the ammunition he needed to launch his super comeback!

And this is more effective then two boots to the stomach how?

"Quick, to the Junk Cave!"

So Chris Jericho is out of the main event at Judgment Day! Boo!! Boo! But he'll get his. He challenged that kid from ringside to a match! And it's for...the Intercontinental title?? What???

So that was Smackdown, but will Judgment Day really be all that good. Let's look at the sponsor, Terminator Salvation: The Video Game. A video game based on a movie sequel. Not just any sequel. Part four. And the game has muddy, gray textures and looks like an average shooter. Yup, average all around. Now why would they sponsor a WWE PPV? Because they have similar audiences and it makes sense? NO! That makes too much sense! No, it's far more likely that the mediocre game is sponsoring this PPV because its a mediocre show. However, we all know that that's Raw's fault...

Still, Smackdown actually has more PPV matches on the card? Let's see how that happened. 8/7 c, MyNetwork TV while you still can!

LOL, Wresslin' recommends: Botchamania

If there's one thing Blog War 09 has taught us, it's that we are not alone in the wrestling comedy spectrum. True, not all of them are all that original, but we welcome the discourse that comes with differing opinions. But one man does his own thing, provides his own commentary, and is downright awesome.

His name is Matthew Gregg (Maffew to his friends) and he produces the Youtube sensation that is Botchamania.

We're not going to post any videos here, because they clock in at about 10 minutes a piece and there's about 75 of them. Just go to this link and check them out at your leisure. Not convinced yet? Ok, we guess we'll have to spell it out!

1) His videos are montages of wrestlers making mistakes. Not just tripping in the ring or a table not breaking, but talking flubs, wardrobe malfunctions, or segments that just died on arrival. Did something not go according to plan? That'll be in Botchamania. Camera catch a wrestler blading? That's there too. There's even a regular segment called "EVERYBODY TALKS TO MUCH" that revolves around a match being audibly called. Triple H is a regular offender there.

2) He uses a vast array of resources. You think the LOLBOP is something? This guy will use a botch from a shaky handheld at some high school gym indy show. He'll find a small segment of a wrestler having difficulty taking his shirt off from a Monday Night Raw in 1994 and add it to his stable of botches. Maybe a fan in the background of a 1980's AWA show is holding a sign that gives something away? He'll find it. The man should be working for the Space Program just for his amazing eye for detail.

3) His soundtrack choice is impeccable. Every single video uses either original MIDI or rock covers of classic video game tunes. Or even more obscure video game songs. Like the original soundtrack to the Gameboy Camera. Or one song from Super Mario RPG. Also, lots of Mega Man tunes, which makes Adam very happy. For the sake of full disclosure, Adam was once in a Mega Man tribute band named Rush Coil and proudly owns these:

Adam: "Why no, I've never kissed a girl before, why do you ask?"

4) Every single video opens up with some insane quote from the Macho Man. Nuff' said.


5) He has a devoted fan following. At just about any wrestling event now, someone will bring a sign that says "Botchamania X: This match" Disrespectful to the athletes in that ring? Sure. But it's a form of constructive criticism. Don't want to end up on Botchamania? Then don't botch.

6) Maffew is also an Internet rebel. You know how often Botchamania is taken down? Constantly. And what's he do? He just throws it up again. He knows the people need Botchamania. Yes, he is a pioneer of Internet justice. Sure, it might not be the Wild West here anymore, but we can at least have our Dodge City! Botchamania is another sanctuary for all of those who want to LOL @ some wresslin'!

...sweet land of liberty...

Wait a second...he's from the UK...like Ray!? Never mind. He sucks.

LOL, Wresslin' recommends: TNA iPhone app.

Phew, that giant Mania recap really sucked out all of our creative juices. We could really just take a few minutes and veg out, if you know what we're saying? Maybe listen to some tunes on the ole' iPod and-


Yes, yes of course. Well believe it or not, TNA did something right. They developed a pretty awesome iPhone application. It's a game, but not a conventional wrestling game. It's more of an RPG, a'la Final Fantasy. Sure, there aren't androgynous teens battling corrupt androgynous governments, and we can't imagine Asian teens blowing off school to play it, but the game still has it's merits.

Anyway, we aren't ones for "grades" here, so let's just run down some of the good and bad points.

The Good:

Surprisingly fun and simple gameplay-

Your wrestler has a hit point meter and does damage with various attacks he unlocks. He also has three defensive manuevers that can be used once per match, but can be refilled if you're awesome enough. Manuvers use the touch screen to good effect.

Fun, cartoony graphics-

Seriously, look at this and tell us you don't want to at least try it.

We wonder if digital Kevin Nash is injured just walking.

Is that ref presenting himself?

We love how everyone is ridiculously jacked except for Samoa Joe

Sound-

Real audio clips of entrance music and crowd chants. Nothing amazing, but certainly a nice touch.

Dry sense of humor-

There is a story mode where you build a jobber into a champion. And you can be a face or heel, depending on the story options you choose. So there will be instances where your character will cut a promo in the ring, when the crowd will react with the most markish responses. For example, if your character is a heel, he may call Christy Hemme a "dog." The crowd will heckle back "Boo!!!" and "A dog is a terrible thing to compare her too!"

It could be Engrish. It could be intentional. All we know is that it cracks us up.

Price-

Five bucks can't be beat.

And for The Bad:

Majority of roster needs to be unlocked-

Seriously, who wants to play an exhibition match between Abyss and Eric Young?

Game crashs about half the time.

Yea, so except for the fact that the game doesn't work, we whole heartedly recommend it! It's kind of like TNA in real life!

Well that's a logical next step

Last year we lost one of the greats. Ric Flair, the stylin', profilin', kiss stealin' wheelin', dealin', son of a gun, hung up the sequined cape that won him sixteen world titles after being a professional wrestler for over thirty years. Since his retirement the Nature Boy has kept busy by doing the appearance circuit and getting beaten up by his daughter's boyfriend.


You'd figure that'd be enough for The Man, especially with rumors that he's making $10,000 a clip at this meet and greets. However, if you think we're the type to just leave it then then clearly you aren't thinking....good. Shut up. Anyway, word just came across the Internets that Mr. Flair just landed him an acting gig. He's playing Commander Hill in, get this, Electronic Arts new expansion pack for their Command and Conquer franchise.



Yes, we are a little confused. We know that C&C is a real-time strategy game, but not being PC gamers nor people who pay attention to details, we've never played them. We hear they're very good. But now? Even better since the dirtiest player in the game joined the cast. Take a look at how excited The Man is:

"When I found out that EA wanted me to be part of Command and Conquer all I could say was 'Wooooooooo!'"

C&C is notable for being a franchise that uses full motion video cut scenes, in comparison to most other games that use CGI rendered cut scenes. You know, because when you juxtapose super detailed graphics with images from a Sega CD game there's not any sort of jarring effect. Not one bit.




Still, this should have no bearing on Slick Ric. We can only hope he's a playable character and you get some special bonus for adding him to your squadron. Or at least a really cool cheat code.

EDIT: We know the Youtube player is too big. No idea how to fix it or remove it. Welcome to LOL, Wresslin'!

LOL, Wresslin' recommends: WWF Wrestlefest

Pop quiz hot shot: what is the greatest country in the world? BUZZ! Time's up. The answer is the United States of America.

In other news, we here at LOL, Wresslin' wish to warm the cockles of your heart with another heartwarming tale of our perfect friendship. However, this is no ordinary story. No, this is our secret origin! Picture if you will Washington, DC in September of 2003 (Hey! That rhymes! We're going to be the next Bubba Sparxx!).


The two Laugh Twins began talking about their mutual love of professional wrestling when all of a sudden Adam remarked "Hey, ever been to the Hippodrome?" Matt being a senior scoffed at the sophomoric Adam and said "Pfft..maybe when I was a freshman, kid." Undeterred, Adam responds "Oh...they have the old WWF arcade game there." Matt ran so fast he left a dust silhouette of himself there which Adam continued talking to for five seconds. Adam then joined Matt at the arcade cabinet where the two of them promptly deposited five dollars each into the machine and had a grand old time. The two left that machine, knowing that this was only the beginning. A firm handshake and the rest was history.

The End....or only the beginning?

Beyond any sentimental aspects, WWF Wrestlefest is a landmark achievement in arcade video games. It offers, not one, but two (!!!) modes of play: Royal Rumble and Tag Team Title Tournament. It has fantastic, cartoon like graphics, sound clips, finishing moves, entrances, tight controls which are also very simple, and a kick-ass roster. Let's look at this roster:

That's Mr. Perfect behind the "W"

Anyway, as we said, there are two modes. The Royal Rumble is exactly as it says it is. You take your wrestler and you have to outlast all the other wrestlers. You do this by either throwing your opponent out of the ring (which is impossible in this game) or making him pin/submit. What's real cool is that you can double and triple pin your opponent. Although Royal Rumble sounds more glamorous then Tag Title Tourney, the truth is, the tag team aspect is the real draw of Wrestlefest.

In Tag Title Tourney, you choose two wrestlers (or just Demolition) and form a team. You work your way up the ranks and eventually take on the Legion of Doom for the belts. However, you wrestle all kinds of exciting matches.

Just a mass of arms and legs

So maybe they didn't have a whole lot of "getting up" animations.

Additionally, the LoD cut promos on you with Mean Gene looking on!

"Animal, what are your favorite recipes for squash?"

Tag Title Tourney also does not have the same time constraints that Royal Rumble has. It's pretty much impossible to win the Rumble on one quarter, but the clock resets with each tag match, assuming you win.

The reason for the phrase "dynamic duo"

Did you see that amazing run to tag team gold? The third match was a CAGE MATCH! In a 1991 arcade game?! True, the cage bears no actual gameplay change, but it's a cage! The old school blue bar one! How cool is that?!

It should be noted that the Laugh Twins, just prior to Matt's departure from university via graduation, were given the chance to purchase the arcade cabinet which forged their friendship like hardened steel. There is a little dispute over the exact price, each having suppressed the memory of passing on the deal, but both agree that it was no more than $400. That's right - four bills for a full-sized stand-up arcade cabinet of WWF Wrestlefest which, being at this particular institution of higher learning, can at worst be described as "gently used" (we were probably the only ones to play the damn thing).

We're stupid.

If you ever have the pleasure of finding one of these at your local pizza parlor or dentist's office, we encourage to lay a little money down and help Jake Roberts recapture a bit of that old glory.